I finally got up after hitting snooze for the hundredth time. I had to check my phone like every other day to wake me up completely. And there it was, several likes, few comments, and a message from my ex on Instagram. My day was ruined already before it had even started.
I thought about it while brushing my teeth, taking a shower, dressing up, having my breakfast, I wondered about it some more on my commute, and then came the rage all at once- What the fuck he wants now that I don’t give a damn about him! I guess this is what happens when you have moved on, living your life, and enjoying your singlehood, a guy from past drops in to check in if you’re still stupid the way you were before. And, you know, I am still that stupid because I replied. Don’t blame me, I was only curious to know what he had to say.
My mind was running like crazy, making hundreds of assumptions per minute- what if he has always loved me, or if he misses me, and wants to get back with me? Maybe he has realized his mistake and wants to apologize for being an asshole. OR, maybe, worst of them all, he wants to be “friends” with me. OMG! what if that is true? Is that even an option? What kind of a territory is that, being friends with your ex? I have never been there. Even thinking about being friends with him makes me hurl.
But, I’ve read that only matured and cool people can stay on good terms with their exes. I am mature and cool, a little, only if a little bit. And even if my relations have never been ended on good terms (My all kind of relationships ended with one yelling in rage and other one crying furiously) doesn’t mean I cannot be friends with one, I can do that, at least that’s what I imagined.
And that was the reason why I replied to him. And guess what, the conversation ended with him calling me a failure, with a fake attitude and I ended up blocking him yet again. Well, I am not really cool, I’ll accept that. Anyway, I do not understand this thing about being friends with your ex. Why you need to be with a person who has done you wrong or was bad to you in some way? It doesn’t make sense to me. Why you want to keep a person in your life who left you for someone/something else? Yeah, forgive them and move on with your life, but why misuse your time? All this is beyond me. I believe this is something extroverts came up with because let us face it, they always need little more people to be their friends, even their exes.
So, yeah I can’t be friends with my ex and if that makes me immature, so be it. Anyway, shouldn’t we focus on more important issues like which series to binge watch next on Netflix, rather than wasting our time on someone we have already moved on from?